"Stop putting food in my food!"

My husband lost it last night.

He’s tired of me sneaking food into his food.

When he came home from work, I told him there were mint-chocolate brownies on the counter. He looked skeptical.

“What’s in them?”

“Mint and cocoa.”

“No, what’s in them? What’s the weird stuff that doesn’t belong there?”

I recently put applesauce in his muffins and spinach in his meatloaf. He’s on to me.

“Nothing. I put food in them.”

He looked at the dishes in the sink; he saw the tell-tale bean flecks in the strainer. “It’s black beans, isn’t it?! Stop putting food in my food!”

Why is it that we will FREAK OUT if someone puts black beans in our brownies, but we’re perfectly okay with someone putting in partially-hydrogenated soybean oil, soy lecithin, maltodextrin, natural and artificial flavors, acacia and xanthan gums, and medium chain trigylcerides?

Those are just some of the ingredients in Duncan Hines brownie mix!

Who’s putting “weird stuff that doesn’t belong there” in the brownies?

Me?

Or Duncan Hines?